Good Honest Broadbat from Yorkshire

Preparations for the much anticipated trip to Lord’s for the CB40 match between  Middlesex Panthers and Yorkshire Carnegie began some three weeks ago with a request for an appointment with the bank manager.

The audience granted, I was fortunate enough to secure a substantial loan and overdraft facility at only a 35%APR, thus had the funds necessary to spend a day in the ‘Smoke’ and at cricket’s ‘headquarters’.

A letter to the Director of Operations asking if I could be admitted the day before the match in order to ensure first place in the queue at the public bar was ignored, perhaps because I had overlooked the necessary SAE for a reply.

Nevertheless, a quick word with my companions for the day was sufficient to agree that we would form a rota for the drinks queue, each taking it in turns to queue for fifteen minutes until one of us finally reached the single barman normally on duty. Thus, each of us missed only half an hour in obtaining the one round we could afford between us.

Queuing is, of course a time honoured ritual at the ’ Home of Cricket’. First join the queue to buy a ticket, then join another queue to present the purchased ticket to gain admission to the ground.

Regrettably, a quick inspection of the Harris Garden drew only sneers. Any good allotment in God’s Own County would have an abundance of manure and soot mixed with the good, honest northern earth to produce the finest, healthiest blooms imaginable, rather than the insipid southern specimen drooping in the unwholesome London atmosphere, now spiced with the acrid smoke from burning cars and houses.

I had decided to wear my Iceman shirt, although being aware that it is not a guarantee of admission. It proved to be just the lucky charm that I had hoped for, as the match result was not the expected one.

This season, the Middle, if I may make so bold as to refer to them by that affectionate name, are the pacesetters in the CB40 and in their division of the Championship, and on the evidence of results to date are a very competent, well balanced team. I had anticipated an excellent team spirit, too, and a significant improvement on the dispirited rabble who played in the corresponding fixture last season and who were trounced by a Yorkshire team who were then as competitive as the Middle are this season. Roles have truly been reversed, to date.

A lone, elderly looter, wearing a beige suit and carrying a plasma tv under one arm and a box of Wisdens under the other, was spotted before play got underway.

The toss was won by Middlesex, after some woman whi minced onto the playing area in high heels, with a cameraman in tow had authorised it to take place. A few others with no need to be on the playing area had also wandered out.  Who do they think they are?

The 60p scorecard had only one change, Finn being replaced by Collymore. Unfortunate for the Middle, as he thus played no part in the Test or the Middle’s game. How daft by the ECB.

Not daft as far as Collymore was concerned, though. After  four good balls that he defended or left, Gale chose, at the last moment to try to play the fifth, got a tickle and walked, Simpson taking the catch behing.

Baistow came in at three and stayed until the thirty fifth over. He and Rudolph played some excellent shots all round the wicket.  Rudolph drove Dial M through the covers for a lovely four, with Bairstow playing his trademark, classic drives through the V.

Collymore seemed to lose his length in the fifth over and was punished for it by Rudolph,  with Bairstow then spanking him over long off for a four to the Warner Stand.

It has to be noted that both subs, Root for Yorks and Williams for Middlesex, failed to wear clothing that would differentiate them from the fielders on their sojourns around the boundary delivering drinks etc, although at least Root, and indeed, the whole Yorks team, had their shirts tucked in their trousers, giving a much neater appearance than the somewhat cavalier appearance of the home team.

But back to the match and it was not entirely a surprise when Rudi smacked Crook to the portly Stirling at deep mid on. Stirling moved sharply to his left to take the catch around his ample midriff. I had sensed that both batsmen’s eyes lit up at Crook’s introduction into the attack and a few ‘big’ shots had already been tried. I’m not sure that I’d regard Dexter and Crook as the ideal second string to support the new ball attack.

Anthony McGrath had had a dreadful season upto Yorkshire’s last match, in which he got a ton, and he was soon catching up Bairstow, no slouch, indeed McGrath was scoring at twice Bairstow’s rate in the partnership that was the basis for Yorkshire’s large total.

McGrath, a keen eater, if appearances are anything to go by, might have been deterred by the Lord’s pies, somewhat small and unappetising and on sale for a laughable £5.00. Even pricier than lager at a scandalous £4.00; £2.20 at Wetherspoons.

The pair added 105, of which  McGrath scored 63 in an entertaininng knock before he smacked Murts straight to Dalrymple at wide mid off, Dalrymple only just hanging on.

The Middlesex fielding was passable, just, and I’d pick out Scott Newman, on the day, as the best one, which gives an indication of the overall standard. Nor was their evidence of much enthusiasm on the field, especially when compared with Yorkshire later.

Ballance, a young Zimbabwean educated at Harrow School and previously on Derby’s books was next in. Bairstow took over the big hitting, the batting power play being on and Ballanced played himself in to some extent

Bairstow went to his ton with a big six to the Nursery End and it had been a very high quality performance from a young man surely destined to follow his father into England ranks.

He was bowled behind his legs by Dexter and replaced by Shahzad.

Balance was missed on a wild hoik by Smith at deep extra, a miss that cost a few, as Balance then clubbed to sixes into the lower Mound Stand in the same over.

A total of 275 looked to be a challenging one, even allowing for the fine conditions. There had been only a slight evidence of swing, I can only recall the batsmen playing and missing twice off defensive shots, and no evidence of turn, Dalrymple bowling only two overs and Smith seven, which cost mim six and a half an over without causing any problems for the batsmen.

A tough job, then for Middlesex with the bat, but certainly not an impossible one.

Their innings started just as Yorkshire’s had, losing a wicket in the first over as Sidebottom from the Pavilion End bowled Newman.

Enter the portly Stirling , something of a Minikey, with  a similar gate and shape, only shorter. Put him alongside the new style Shane Warne, with his Austin Powers teeth and you are in the movies.

But his batting was no joke as he caned Sidebottom and Shahzad, putting Sidi away for three fours in an over.

Andy Gale isn’t afraid of using spin during power plays and Rashid is well up to it.

The way Stirling played him suggested he couldn’t read the googly and he got Malan in his second over, lbw, perhaps to the top spinner or googly. Anyhow, Malan seemed unhappy with the decision, but had to go. Rogers went the same way 30 runs later, but danger man Stirling was still there and playing a full range of excellent attacking shots. He is especially strong through the covers.

Spin was clearly Yorkshire’s way forward and at the end of the second powerplay Wainwright came on at the Nursery End. His initial overs, when Stirling was blazing away were pushed through just short of a length, so the powerful batsman couldn’t engage his drives.

Although the run rate was reducing it was still very reasonable, with Dexter also playing excellent shots, especially drives and a fine full for six of Rashid early in his innings.

This might have been the partnership to determine the match, but Stirling holed out to Wainwright, cracking one straight to Yorkshire’s most reliable fielder, Rich Pyrah at deep mid off. Dexter followed a few runs later, caught by Wainwright on the deep square boundary in front of the Mound Stand, becoming Rashid’s third wicket.

The Yorkshire spinners had put their side into a strong position. Once  Stirling was out, Wainwright changed his attack, flighting the ball and bowling a full length.

Given to failure of the Yorkshire quicks and the success of their spinners, Gale somewhat surprisingly brought Rudolph on at the Pavilion end. Rudiactually bowls rubbish, specialising in the full toss, while attempting leg spin and the only way a wicket was likely to fall was through a run out.

Indeed, that is just what happened, as Dalrymple tried a leg bye, as one crept off his pad a couple of yards on the leg side to about silly mid on. A very slight hesitation made no real difference, as Bairstow was extremely quick to the ball and threw down the bowler’s end wicket with Dalrymple well short.

Worse was to follow well Crook went for a lunatic second run and Rudolph at deep square returned to ball to Wainwright the bowler, for Simpson to be out by almost half the pitch. It really was a daft run and Simpson would have been well within his rights to shout, “OI, CROOK, NO. I admire your enterprise and enthusiasm, but not your judgement of a run. Now stay where you are or I’ll give you a slap.”

That was about the end of it, or at least it should have been, because living a bit dangerously, Crook and Smith added 88 and Yorkshire supporters were beginning to wonder it the match was being taken away from them. There were three drops during the stand, two quite difficult by McGrath, possibly with his mind on his dinner, at Mid On, and one by Shahzad in the deep, running in and trying to take it low, but Sidebottom hung on to a good one, low at deep mid on to remove Smith. He might well have been surprised that Smith hadn’t attempted yet another reverse sweep or Dilshan scoop.

The game Crook thumped one down to deep square off Pyrah where Gale took the catch then Murts holed out to Pyrah, well taken very low by Balance at long on, to leave Yorkshire winners of a very entertaing match by a much smaller margin than appeared likely at one time and which had seemed most unlikely before play began.

Middlesex’s man of the match? Well I made it Stirling ahead of Crook for an excellent innings full of good cricket shots and a neat catch.